My husbandand I have been married for almost eight years. Compared to some older couples in love, we’re still newlyweds, but I can say with confidence that romance looks a lot different than it did at the beginning of our relationship. We’re more tired, we have more conversations about groceries than life goals, and we definitely don’t get dressed up for each other as much as we used to. Despite the fact that he practically lives in his ratty old t-shirt, I still get that warm feeling when I glance across the room and realize he’s mine. Keeping your connection growing and your fire burning takes intention whether it’s been two years or 20. If you want your love to grow and not fade, try these 5 things couples in love can do every day.
1. Make eye contact.
I can’t tell you how many times I’m busy doing something else while my husband is speaking: checking my phone, putting away groceries, cleaning up. When we both put down what we’re doing, look into each other’s eyes, and fully pay attention, especially when communicating, we are making each other a priority. We’re saying, “The laundry can wait. You’re more important.”
2. Hug and smooch.
It’s amazing how much better my day gets when I take the time to give my husband a full wraparound hug in the morning. Turns out it’s also a scientific fact. Oxytocin, also known as the “cuddle hormone,” gets released when we hug, producing feelings of bonding, trust, and devotion. While you’re at it, a kiss that’s longer than a peck will remind you both you’re not just roommates.
3. Laugh together.
It’s normal to let the practical details of life crowd out your humor, but couples in love have inside jokes that keep the relationship strong. Laughter triggers the release of endorphins and lowers stress. It also increases attraction to your partner. So laugh at that joke, or make one of your own. You never know what it might lead to.
4. Compliment each other.
Successful couples strengthen their connection by verbally expressing what they appreciate and like about one another. I noticed when I say thank you to my husband, or compliment his strengths, he responds by giving me more affection. So don’t focus on the negative, look for the positive, and you might be surprised what you receive in return.
5. Forgive each other.
Even couples who are in love hurt each other. Chances are, the last time your husband hurt you, he didn’t do it intentionally. When you confront your husband to say he’s done something wrong, remember to choose your words carefully. And don’t be afraid to ask him now and then if there’s anything you’ve done that has hurt him. Then ask for forgiveness. Talking about even small offenses ensures disconnection and discord don’t build up in your relationship and choke it.
What else do you think should be added to the list?
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